He left patches, And i have... Four pieces i need to connect To lace up my disconnect With two pieces, Velcro, nearly new— A name, an insignia, our two. We thought it’d been laced up, A decade ago, But it fused black marks, Spots filled in that heart, So dark— Forever dark, but warranting Spacious... Continue Reading →
Open, but so tired of changing So tired—Of losing control Igniting different places Ignited by and bye, again This Overzealous mind. Days of wine and Roses Quenched breathes on necks Kisses on eyes, Fingers in mouths For giggles and smiles. We started counting: Adding, subtracting and dividing our time. My serotonin was multiplied. And all... Continue Reading →
Experience is rewarding; Bodies collide and disperse along breaking tides of blood, sweat and tears. Experience is growth; Bodies buried deep beneath the Earth and within the heart’s callous surface. Experience is differential: You will never understand or underestimate the opinion, reasoning or conundrum which has mother-fucking-formed my view— or lack thereof. Experience is understanding:... Continue Reading →
I’m tired of her shit. Tired of her anger Her lackadaisical nature. I’m tired of her grief And the lack thereof, Her inability to breathe Under an economy so bleak. No simple curtail is in order, She’ll rely on prompt compression For decompression. Her serotonin, soon lonesome Finding notions of emotions, Once flowing. So goodbye,... Continue Reading →
Calloused hands don’t determine the dexterity, one has to offer. Tan lines on imperfect bodies are hard to swallow. Similar journey’s began untarnished, ignorant and lackadaisical. Later Quests fulfilled with a variety of abandonment and astonishments. I’d rather life start taking body parts, dismembering my heart first.
When you have no desire to just fuck. Conquests become less and less Occasionally left to ponder, and second-guess My pill-pusher’s reassurance, “You need this.“
Once again, dawning my robe Thinking of you. Yours, and how comfortable-- In blue. 🎶My mother told me that world has got it's plans. I wanna hold 'em till they burn right through my hands.🎶 That ice on my skin, Burning numb And swallowing me. Like protein and smoke. 🎶But rising on up and then... Continue Reading →
It started raining on my way to your place. I took the long way, hoping to calm my incessant nerves. I wondered if the rain was trying to water something in me, I felt so cold, rigid and angry. My thoughts of you weren’t, aren’t fine, kind or blind. And I feel alive for the... Continue Reading →
My heart breaks Because his, is breaking. Loss in passing. Ours, Yours, Mine. We continue; We break: The same.
Sunday, two-thousand and twenty, Though, Always setting on the twelfth. Sadness sweeps over sleep Uneasy shudders shatter Unextinguished embers. And He's been fucking gone for so fucking long--- My Father. A Not-So-Sweet, Sixteen Years of grief, disbelief And now... She's fucking gone. My Mother. I'm smothered by Seriousness, mixed with Sauvignon. Soundly sinking Into the... Continue Reading →
The ebb and flow Ejaculates yesterday's soul. The bitter cold Calculates countless roles. So dark, drab, damned Unquestionably sorrowful. December's claim, Driving out ducklings in despair. On the water, Irreprehensible and fair. Deceiver Chased away A long time Coming
There is nothing less appropriate for a 33 year old woman, then drinking to the point of a Blackout2 hours, unaccounted for. $20, unaccounted for. My car is a mess. Skunk costume, unworn. I drove. Fuck.
Sometimes, I just cry. Even on my meds. Little things-- Mom's granola bar, 10 months past expiration. His invitations My fur-babies. My refrigerator My 600lb life. Out of Xanax. Out of money. Out of family. Just cry, baby girl. Just cry.
Static on the line, I hear it all the time But I'm quiet when you make me fade Feel it coming back, watch it turn to black But I'm brighter when you make me fade You make me fade, you make me fade You make me brighter when you make me fade KFlay has consistently... Continue Reading →
And I lost "it"-- The label. Forever? I Overthink. After Overthinking, About... Overthinking. Now Just Waiting....
https://youtu.be/RVErCnCguWE I've been avoiding a call from someone I once knew Ain't got no parachute breaking my fall, believe it's more fun to Not give a fuck for a minute at all, yeah I'm looking for some truth But I'm complacent when facing the wall, know you want me to want you Never took one... Continue Reading →
I'm going back-- For seconds. Knowing I'm showing My true self This time around I'm glowing And he's.... A Cunt. Not saying... Just-- Saying.
Cheer up, baby girl. * I love you, Dani. * As my mother laid in bed, on her first evening in hospice--June 11, 2019, I sat to her right side, held her hand and bawled my eyes out. The last coherent words, were for me: "Cheer up, baby girl." On the morning of January 12,... Continue Reading →
Short-lived, serendipitous and sly, I suppose. It's Sunday, I'm sleep-deprived and solemn, to say.... the slightest? Scorned. Scored? Still insecure. So I escaped. I'm secluded, substantially. Sarcastically scared, scratched and screwed. Sense and sensitivity. Sensibilities are shadows. I am a shadow. Spring stands on my shoulders. I stand on sticks of sacrilegious stares. Searching for... Continue Reading →
For Mother's Day I received 6 months Of birth control. Today would be My father's 63rd Birthday. I couldn't imagine Birthing a child, Raising a child, Loving a child-- Making a child happy, Healthy, heroic. So I popped for pills On Mother's Day, One the next. Repeat Repeat Repeat Repeat Repeat... Retreat.
I can only assume this stems from an "ignorance is bliss" platform, but nonetheless I will always choose hard truths. I've been beaten and bruised, internally, for far too long and it diminishes my capacity to trust. Ignorance is not bliss; Thoreau wanted the masses educated, but even in that we find a double edged... Continue Reading →
Too tired to sleep Too anxious to dream My eyes can barely see. These hallways, so long Barren, and dull. I wish I could just Breathe. I warm my coffee With free, fresh-brewed, Cheap and bitter Packets of brown Grit--like dirt. Juxtaposed With a walk, My eyes creep Open. And I decide I'll just get... Continue Reading →
"... I think today is the day." These are the words my mother said this morning, after she woke me up to help her find her pain pills. Last night my oldest sister decided to purchase her a new sorter for the meds she now has to take, everyday--so upon waking up, her confusion was... Continue Reading →
When you're depressed, You're missing out. Life doesn't stop. Death doesn't stop. Cancer doesn't stop. Yet, your demeanor Dwindles to a speck Of what used to be-- Your smile. Your guile. Your wit. Your grip-- Of what matters Outside of yourself-- Diminishes. There is no spark, Unless accompanied By booze, Or pills, Or pot. Your... Continue Reading →
We are given so much, a crutch we take advantage of. And rarely consider, one day our chance will be completely up. We fight when we should embrace, face to facing our fates. And place blame where kisses could erase frivolous debates.
Like the one My dad stuffed With his gun, That time I thought... Like the one I found his stash Of stems and seeds, The last sack he bought. Like the one That sits in my office, Fifteen years later, Visitors sit in that chair. * Like the one My sister bought She brought it... Continue Reading →
It's back I have the flame To prove it. It burns The skin, Unthinkably Torching The unfeeling The undead. I picked a flower Simultaneously Throwing it Back down To the ground. Unnecessary Spoils Of war.
I hope. Because hope is all I have left. Nothing solidified. Constantly waning through Overdrawn accounts Undervalued character Overused emotions Underused meds Overwhelming doubt Underwhelming encounters Overzealous opinions Underdeveloped romance. Here's to hoping.
Followed by 36 hours in bed. Or 40 something hours... I just woke up and don't feel like doing the math. I'm exhausted I need a shower and a pack of smokes. *** Insert Shower *** Roll another smoke from my pouch of Bugler. *** I'm tired of making poor choices but they always seem... Continue Reading →
Cancer found it's first chance to cinch it's claws deep in my chest. No courtesy. Only consequence and cantankerous chemical combinations. Cigarettes and contrived cassonade cause cancer. Cindy consumes and collects these cancerous creations in her company--constantly. Cindy created my chance to comprehend constellations. Calling her Cindy is off-color. I am her child. She is... Continue Reading →
My mother has cancer. I don't get paid to work. My mother funds me. My habits lack respect * Why would you neglect that which nourishes you? * My mother has cancer I'm interviewing for jobs My mother has a tumor behind her eye My depression tries to care. * Why the fuck does she... Continue Reading →
If I ceased to exist, how would you know? As you've noticed, I have these bouts of silence when I'm not proud of myself, but content in just getting by with a lackadaisical existence. To think, this time last year, you, my readers were my best friends--my lifeline--I've told you this. My Crocodile tears Fall... Continue Reading →
Sitting down at 10pm. Today is still yesterday. The depressed and anxious Mind erases the colored pencil Lines designed by the heart.
Three glasses of cab, at the bar-Inadvertently, And that was just Monday.... just twenty-four hours ago, Those hours spent swallowing, now--Tuesday. Sleepless at best; without wine; enduring-Lacking. Suspense, still, soon.... Today will be Yesterday Tomorrow, the past. Everyday, making mistakes.
But I'm not sure who I am anymore. Am I really this unfeeling? Or is it just an act? Self preservation? Evolution? Regurgitation? Indignation? Subjugation? In summation--I..., I guess I care Not. Not to ponder. Not to react--add, Or subtract. If it's blatantly Stabbing me, I am too numb Or tired Or intoxicated To feel... Continue Reading →
I've always been "the nice girl". That's how people from primary and secondary school describe me, on those random occasions when my social anxiety barely allows me to understand their words. I'm definitely not the same girl; not that they'll ever find that out. In my online dating profile on Tinder, I describe myself as... Continue Reading →
Haha! But oddly, no more Dollars short In juxtaposition With the rest. Hours late. Minutes crumbling Under the weight Of missing serotonin. Bleh. Blatant. Indignation. Past life With Present life. Hypocritical At best.
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .... Enough money within her control to move out... And rent a place of her own even if she never wants to or needs to... Something perfect to wear if the employer or date of her dreams wants to See Her in an hour... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... A youth... Continue Reading →
Getting back on my full medication regimen today. It's been weeks since my doses have been taken as prescribed. I guess I hope I imagine... Things will get better.
Arrived at the hospital, 1a.m. My ex fiancé's twin brother. He fell. Fractured his skull in 2 places. Bleeding on the brain. Spinal fluid leaking from his ear. • I'm here. His twin. Is Nowhere In sight. • Some things never change.
It has been a while since I lost my insurance. It has been a while since I felt emotions. Tomorrow I will struggle to get the cash for my pill pusher appointment and the coinciding medications. Tomorrow I will get back on the regimen I had before the lapse in stability. Today I have poured... Continue Reading →
I'm late, 28 minutes as I write this sentence. I've had 2 cups of coffee, My makeup is half done I haven't worn my glasses Since I was last blasted By the depression. Happy Monday...
It's breathing right now. I just picked her up. Garage sale money. • I'm breathing right now. Earlier, life attacked. Weekend bender. • I'm heaving life around Like I'm drowning. Mental Inadequacies. • I'm leaving, letdown By my decline. My serotonin inhibitors. • I'm grieving, system shutdown An emotional imp. A tragic liar. • I'm... Continue Reading →
I'm fully disappointed in myself. Because I don't feel or care. Everything is lackluster and. My life seems so bare. • I went to the bar by myself. Like I do Thursday through. Saturday--Sometimes Sunday. I drink through foggy hues. • We sip whiskey, my friends and myself. I chain smoke and waste my body.... Continue Reading →
I fell in love with my tattoos again, in this new life I've subscribed to. And now it's summer so I get to wear cute off the shoulder shirts that show them off. The nautical stars on each of my shoulders are what remains of my earliest years after high school, my first three years... Continue Reading →
I figured it would happen eventually. A man my age showed up out of nowhere. He has a great smile and believe it or not, after 3 weeks, he has yet to say anything asinine or disrespectful. Crazy, right!? He still doesn't know my feelings are M.I.A., that should be an interesting conversation. We'll leave... Continue Reading →
The sheer thought of a universe-- Crashes down on my shoulders Like a large body on an old mattress. It's flows, forgetting to ebb And steals away my breath Continuous waves, crippling my neck. Because in that universe is a diversity-- Burrowing into our perceptions of why We are here, it scares me: My fractured... Continue Reading →
At the very least, he was a month late. Over a month late after 2 weeks of profound avoidance and unanswered questions, texts... He would walk away when I would try to speak to him at our regular bar--which we both continue to use. So, yes, I had to give up on the extremely short... Continue Reading →
Don't worry, She's safe: That girl inside of me. I hurry, But she'll Be there to slow me. She needed A break From my muffled surroundings. I needed A break From her feeling shenanigans. She's tough And so am I I feel it in our inconsistencies I feel That I'll feel In time, with full... Continue Reading →
He would have been 61 He has been gone for 14 years 4 months And 11 days. I was 17 The last time I wished him Happy Birthday In person. Today I'll pick up A can of his chew. I'll take a dip of Skoal Wintergreen Long cut I'll let the shards Cut Into my... Continue Reading →
An Anniversary-- The Anniversary A Culmination Of nearly a Decade Absorbed and Gone by. Tomorrow creeps Shrinks and completes My middle journey My epiphany From His entanglement. I am stronger now But also more jaded And fragmented Than ever. He had a bad knee And today, out of nowhere I experience Physical Empath-- My knee... Continue Reading →
11 days to go. • I've been planning a trip to Philadelphia, PA for the past month to visit a friend I haven't seen in 8 years. To spend a weekend with Him. My plan was to leave for Philly on the 26th, and head back home on the 29th. 11 days from today. I... Continue Reading →
We were engaged for 4 years and were together for 7... On April 29th, 13 days from today, I will have left the home I bought with my ex and three step-children for an entire year. Like February 14th, the day he proposed (and changed the meaning of Valentines Day, forever), I don't see myself... Continue Reading →
When March Madness began, I decided I wanted to get back out in the social world--which ultimately meant visiting bars once again. I cannot say it is the best way to get back out into the world, but I have also visited art museums, frequently gone to dinner with my mom and friends, as well... Continue Reading →
The polish on my fingers started chipping on the tips again, yesterday. I meant to spend some time removing the polish, with actual nail polish remover but the evening got away from me. This morning in the shower, the raised edges of polish disrupted the ease of my finger through my hair as I washed... Continue Reading →
Life. It's funny. Thursday I experienced 24 hours of depression, sparked by a poor playlist selection, titled "Emotions 2018". 24 hours later, I played a mix inspired by AJR, which also includes The Wrecks, Dreamers, Twenty-One Pilots, Finish Ticket, The Score, Coin and The Unicorns. It worked. Music is for the soul. Your likes are... Continue Reading →
I'm listening to him snore. Tonight, It's 12am and he fell asleep With his earbuds in The mouthpiece likely Sits near his neck. The vibration of his breathing is Intoxicating Supplementary. Because there is something lacking As I lean on his breath. But how can it be lacking If it's never been there?
March Madness is the only time of year when the madness around me far surpasses my own— Happy Madness to all! via My March Madness Fact
I was never sure what would come from starting a blog. I reached out to an audience at one of the lowest points in my life and never expected, that two months into it, 101 of you would care to read or like a single word I had to say, much less follow me! ❤️... Continue Reading →
The heat wanes But not due to Incompatibility. I've been burned Too many times-- Permanently marred. I can't sink Into oblivion Anymore. Unless it's compatible With my habits-- My needs. My desires are few But imperative-- And mine. The heart wants What the heart Needs.
Wow, Zoloft--is that you? Or is it my newfound lease On life? * Things are getting brighter. Depression wanes and I'm happy. * With one additional pill The Xanax no longer has the Stronghold. * I'm happier without marijuana Which I never expected-- Natural highs. * I had little faith that my brain-- That my... Continue Reading →
Fifteen minutes prior to leaving for my Talk Therapy appointment, yesterday, I felt an attack coming on--so i took half of a Xanax. On my drive to her office, my heart beat increased and I took the other half. Typically, I would have taken another half around 9pm, to curb the tensions my mind had... Continue Reading →
Off the bat, I'll say: I'm VERY comfortable with my therapist. I didn't cry with my pill pusher, yesterday. That's a first, I hate talking about my anxiety, just to have more pills shoved down my throat. But that's my current life status. We started on mindfulness today. After the first attempt, I gave 3... Continue Reading →
Every time. I pull up to my Therapist's office, there seems to be a young girl, waiting to shoot a smile in my direction. I think of her future and mine. I think of the reasons behind our smiles. I think of my age, 32--her's, likely, merely 12. She smiles; I smile back. But I... Continue Reading →
After more Than a year. I felt lips-- Again. * Today, It doesn't Feel Right-- Again. * My team Was defeated And I lost-- Again. * I said: I Vow To Live, Again. * It is Not Living If it is with Those Lips.
Culture Comes to Kansas for a Lady https://peeingonmute.wordpress.com/2018/03/03/culture-comes-to-kansas-for-a-lady/ — Read on peeingonmute.wordpress.com/2018/03/03/culture-comes-to-kansas-for-a-lady/
Today I contacted my Alma Mater in regards to getting a second Master's Degree in Public Administration. Apparently: I have a profound desire to make the world(my community) a better place; I love intellectual stimulation; I NEED to get out of KS; I refuse to teach HS English with my first Graduate Degree; I refuse... Continue Reading →
The depressed and anxious mind gets weary. I am not only my anxiety. I am not only my depression. I am not only my early-onset OCD. I am not only my ED--if it's there. I was once "dirka squirrel". Please don't take offense, I used to be a belligerent stoner without rules or regulations. I... Continue Reading →
Depression who? I mean, look at that landscape! Below the skyline, you can see the lights of Colorado Springs, right before sunset. It was a frigid 19 degrees with the wind in my face, thousands of feet above sea level. But it wasn't only the wind which took my breath away. Transcendence. I vow to... Continue Reading →
I did not cry in her office today. I smiled and laughed and cursed. Trust and tiny pieces of happiness.
I breathed in And out The Denver air With rigorous voracity. * It put my mind At ease with Past Present Future. * Life became whole Again In this reckless Brain, of mine. * Tomorrow I Will Spring With temperament And a new Found love. * For breathing.
So, I'm not going to lie--yesterday I took twice my prescribed dose of Xanax. But I also voyaged on my first solo road trip.... Ever! At 32 years old! I drove 9 hours West of home and with the grace of God, I made it to my destination in one piece. Today, I am looking... Continue Reading →
Per suggestions of a close friend, I recently fell into a rabbit hole of stand up comedy acts, on Netflix. I initially wanted to make this a post in my "Divorced but Never Married" series--but in speaking with this friend, I realized I am utterly over drudging on the past transgressions which my ex-fiance inflicted... Continue Reading →
So there is vino In my veins. There is moonlight In my shame-- Which bewilders My counterclaim. * So I may be weak But utterly cognizant Of my aim. To regain My flaming Confidence. * And I take steps. I break frets. I steal nets Which catch me In my own depths. * Of self-righteousness--... Continue Reading →
My vulnerabilities Aren't stronger Than my character-- Anymore. * So last night I did. Last night I danced--I sang. I'm 32, but danced Like I was 21. * I locked eyes With masculine strangers-- They'd inch closer, Hand on hip--but no. Not yet. * I vow to indulge But not be consumed. Because it was... Continue Reading →
What a week!!! This is sure to be a long post, brimming with depression, anxiety, therapy, strength, epiphanies, and maybe even a little pleasure. I may leave that last one lacking in concrete details, but allusions will be made, take them as you wish. Two months ago, on my birthday, I received a Facebook PM... Continue Reading →
Four years ago he asked me to marry him; I said yes and we played adult board games for the remainder of that Valentines Day. I think I'm going to sell the engagement ring. I'm going to sell the pearl necklace, because it's a white pearl. My heart is suited to Tahitian Pearls. There was... Continue Reading →
I drank last night. I smoked last night. Yesterday I told him I was falling. I gotta stay high all the time To keep you off my mind I am falling But I can't And I won't Because today is about me. Trying to forget you babe I fall back down My sobs are inconsolable Because... Continue Reading →
I'm used to the burden Regardless of my Waning strengths, I will bandage Your paper cuts-- While a major artery Flows with fury From my body. Because you mean Everything or Something. But definitely Not nothing.
I started peeling away the black nail polish at 1:30 this morning, with the voracity of a prepubescent boy entertaining his first hard on. It was as involuntary as my sobbing over the past eight months. For the past 30 days, I piled layer upon layer of the thick, black goop on my nails; It was... Continue Reading →
I rummage for Empty space On country roads. And vociferate New melodies. And-- "I-I-I-I-I can't stop." Reveling on Involuntary sobs, Insurmountable distance, Unconquerable regrets. I've missed 100 percent of the shots I didn't take. So these ducts Well over With unease. And the music Plays on Repeat. "I-I-I-I-I can't stop"
It's followed me For fifteen years. Around every corner of depression and elation-- Agitation. A green, blueprint to So many bad Selections. Fabricating a dark Chasam In my cognitive Suggestions. My longest Relationship-- A soul-destroying Anthology Of numbing Concentration. So today-- I give you up. For clarity. For brighter Moments. For better Tomorrows.
For the final four months of my seven year relationship, I slept on the couch, a papasan mattress and ultimately a Queen mattress on the floor of my home office. My nights on the couch weren't frequent at first, I'd sleep there if I was having cramps or unable to get a panic attack to... Continue Reading →
I wasn't able to post this weekend. So you're welcome. I am sure everyone likes a break from the monotony of my fragmented prose and sporadic poetics. My weekend was full to the brim, but not in the optimistic sense. I was literally in constant motion--which entailed nearly six full hours of driving, five of... Continue Reading →
The depressed and anxious mind takes time to understand the frivolous nature of society--before it stages it's coup de grâce. Photo credit: What's Wrong With Today's Society Captured In 10+ Though-Provoking Illustrations By Al Margen
What can I do When nothing Seems cohesive? When Life Is "simply: A jumbled mess Of Anxiety Impropriety And sobriety. While society Delegates Propriety For notoriety, Which never Existed.
Wow... what a month. Bear with me as I get a much needed, month late, chronicle off my chest. It was New Years Eve, exactly one month ago today. I had not been feeling well, so I cancelled my plans to go out. This was an obvious sigh of relief for my newly single, anxious... Continue Reading →
Put 1000 miles Between us And I'll spill It All. * But I won't reveal My life And socialize. * And I can't tell you Why I rely On strangers Just to Get by. * Utility or Drawback? Anxiety or Trivial Inferiority? * I can't Commit. Equally A Mess. Physically Present. Mentally Transcendent. * Advertising... Continue Reading →
I vow to make smarter choices this time around. That is when I finally take the leap... It cannot be Simply carnal. Even though It's all electric And raw. The passion! There will be No room For vanity I need intellectual Fornication. Mental Stimulation. Heart pounding Mind stinging Resuscitation Of Shakespeare's Hamlet and Austen's sensibilities.... Continue Reading →
I still feel At the space With the thumb Of my left finger. That finger automatically Gives way And curls Down. But I don't let him touch me anymore I said "I'm not something to butter up And taste when you get bored 'Cause I have spent too many nights on dirty bathroom floors. To... Continue Reading →
I read somewhere that in order to truly get to know a mate, especially prior to marriage, you should at least give a full turn of the seasons to get to know that person. I was automatically intrigued by the notion. Couldn't this apply my relationship with me? In Refusing to Date, I stated I... Continue Reading →
Well, today's first real therapy appointment was no different than the first time I presented my anxiety disorder to a GP. I left the office, unimpressed and angry. Faint streaks of mascara were camouflaged by the appearance of dark circles, beneath my eye. I was sure this time would be different: A real therapist would... Continue Reading →
There are those days--the ones where your strengths and weaknesses decide they will work together in solidarity. Yesterday was one of those days; full of plans that I planned all on my own, completely alone. I'd forgotten what a full day felt like and so did my anxiety. 12:00 p.m., I made it to the... Continue Reading →
I had something stolen from me, at the age of nineteen. A friend, of a friend, found himself meritorious. "I just start kissing them. It’s like a magnet. Just kiss. I don’t even wait. And when you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything.... Grab ’em by the pussy. You can... Continue Reading →
Literally On a physical level. I'm half a Xanax in; A full pain-pill down: my hip is out of place and my sciatic is pinched. Figuratively On a social level. I'm dealing with a minuscule circle: circling the minds of writers; interacting with little intellectual stimulation, in a small Kansas town. Metaphorically On a mental... Continue Reading →
In a previous post, titled "Refusing to Date", I stated that "you cannot love someone unless you know and love yourself." When I left my ex of seven years, I was left with misappropriated sorrow in my heart. It has taken eight months for me to fully absorb this conundrum. Today I know, that I... Continue Reading →
There are times, as an adult, where you step back and wonder how you let far-fetched butterflies bombard your system. Raw. Sensual. Unrequited Excitement. I nearly made it a full day without my Xanax.
Everything clicked today. Well, not everything, of course, but in 50degree weather, I braved out into the world and contemplated some of my demons. At one point, I felt the endorphins in my body release and that old feeling of contentment enveloped me. I had errands to run: I needed to pick up some blank... Continue Reading →