It started raining on my way to your place. I took the long way, hoping to calm my incessant nerves. I wondered if the rain was trying to water something in me, I felt so cold, rigid and angry. My thoughts of you weren’t, aren’t fine, kind or blind. And I feel alive for the... Continue Reading →
How many of you made the unfortunate stroll back to your ex due to the Rona? This unfortunate soul did: "See how [she] cowers" No, neither do I. Quarantined enlightenment? Maybe It's ok though. And hopefully if you've made the same trip through this corona-misadventure, you've learned something as well. Diamonds Eyes was always an... Continue Reading →
I believe I've been jaded By dating. Everything is uncomfortable To the touch. Especially the one who spit In my face. He hangs on too long, after my Half-assed hug. I'm tired of feeling diminished Incomplete Fuck dating....
Tribulations truncated Twisted into tears Or tenaciously troubled By tactless Tiresome Tawdry Tedious Temperamental... Trials, Tasking my tetchy trips... B-b-b-Back..... Towards you: Tinder Trial #2.
He bought me sushi, And I listened to him snore. He lights My soul On fire. Those fucking Diamond eyes.
In those Diamond eyes. Finally. Like Pulling teeth-- Pins And needles-- Vibe. Squashed?Or Squishy?Definitely Sublime. Again-- My Redefined... Clarity.
Botta Box And breaks At bedtime. I'm bedraggled Because of The Cabernet. It's belittling The habit To inebriate My being. Belittle my Beginnings-- His belittling Rambles mine. I'm begging. He's bragging. I'm betraying My Dignity.
🎼Go ahead and watch my heart burn With the fire that you started in me But I'll never let you back to put it out🎼 "He wasn't going to come back," I thought to myself. He was going to be the love I lost for no reason--and he hurt ME! He destroyed the Love I... Continue Reading →
Wanna date me? 😂😂😂 Trying to have a light-hearted evening. Couple drinks with my best girls. We are all so different So confrontational So much.... my family.
Tinder.... Ugh. Met one-- Thought of another Messaged a 3rd Sent a selfie to the 4th. None of them, I'm sure. Want me for the long haul.
I don't know what made me think I wanted to start dating again. In December, I downloaded a few dating apps, inevitably went through two terrible dates and an epistolary novel's worth's of messages, until I met a man who I was thoroughly intrigued by. We started messaging the day after my 33rd birthday. Met... Continue Reading →
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pE8mWOgMpP8 I haven't figured out what love is. Have you? I doubt I am a sociopath, so that's not My delay. What's yours? I mean, I love this song, But it doesn't love me back. A man loves this song, and If it reminds him, of me-- What does that mean? I don't even... Continue Reading →
We both medicate to get through the day. But I don't feel his, fully. Might he diminish mine, early? We both shut down in our own way. But our times are off And it is so early on. How do we traverse these waves? The ebb and flow pulsates, picks up and vibrates my soul,... Continue Reading →
But I was asking, When I put on the first coat of red nail polish. I was asking, For something different, something adventurous in our minds. I put the second coat on and didn't bother with a top coat. Is this where I went wrong? At 33, you'd think I'd be prepared... I'm terrible at... Continue Reading →
I met him because of the internet. Our proximity had something to do with it. Social media lets me fall in love with tiny bits of his life-- his days, his memories. We don't really have much, yet. Though both our days include medicating-- that's new. In person his demeanor is subtle, yet so striking,... Continue Reading →
I've always been "the nice girl". That's how people from primary and secondary school describe me, on those random occasions when my social anxiety barely allows me to understand their words. I'm definitely not the same girl; not that they'll ever find that out. In my online dating profile on Tinder, I describe myself as... Continue Reading →
And it has been over 2 months since my last rambles, but I think I'm ready to talk again. Time is just a number we juxtapose with others. My pill pusher upped my Zoloft to 100mg; Buspar down to 15mg; my Xanax intake is down 30% since I last wrote. That familiar old numb feeling.... Continue Reading →